Surprised? Yeah, I know, but give me a break, I couldn’t rank the top grossing film of all time any lower than this (zing)… It may seem harsh, but I feel Avatar deserves a little criticism after it paid hundreds of millions of advertising dollars convincing us it’s the best film ever made (baaaaaa-zing). Personal qualms aside, though, no one can argue the immense success of the film and it is spectacular in 3-D, IMAX (hope you crammed one of those in your living room [zing]).
Zingers aside, when the top business minds of the country are discussed, I feel James Cameron has earned a mention. Take this film back to its concept and think of what he must have had to sell to Fox. I imagine it went something like this:
Cameron: “I’ve been working on this script for a really long time and the technology has finally caught up to it, so let’s do it!”
Fox Exec: “How much?”
Cameron: “Well, did I tell you about the story? It’s a mythological tale of human conquest and exploitation of a foreign land in order to mine its rich minerals. Then-“
Fox Exec: “It’s about the U.S. invasion of Iraq?” (zing… okay, I’ll stop)
Cameron: “No, you didn’t let me finish. A disenchanted Marine takes sympathy with the natives’ plight and turns into one of the local blue cat-people and fights against the corrupt oil (cough) mineral drillers.”
Fox Exec: “So… it’s Dances with Wolves- wait, did you say blue cat-people? Doesn’t matter. How much?”
Cameron: “It’s going to be totally awesome and you’re going to make a killing!”
Fox Exec: “How much?”
Cameron: “Conservatively… $300 million.”
Fox Exec: “I don’t know…”
Cameron: “Titanic.”
Fox Exec: “Deal.”
And both Cameron and Fox were absolutely right! It did make a killing! What they had the foresight to see was that 3-D and IMAX are the only point of differentiation for watching a film at the theater rather than on your beautiful, HD, LED screen at home. People still like going to the movies and they want excuses to see a film in theaters, but, for most films, the people that can afford to go would probably just as soon keep that thirty bucks (including date and popcorn/drink/whatever) in their pocket and wait until they can put it on their queue (like you wonderful people who read my blog!). However, 3-D and IMAX are a whole different can of worms. There was no 3-D in anyone’s homes at the time. If you could utilize that technology so that the theater experience is unique from anything you could see at home, then… then… $2,734,434,940. F*** me, it worked!
So, why do I dislike the film? First and foremost, it was an awful screenplay. There’s not much redeeming about it at all. Early on it became clear to me that the story served only as a vehicle to show off Pandora (and all the time, thought, creativity, and money put into it, which is impressive) and to promote an environmentalist message that eerily bordered on crossing into cult territory.
The story line is completely recycled. I’m a realist. I know storylines get recycled all the time, but this one really had no twists or turns that mark it as original. Dances with Wolves and Pocahontas are the same story, just a different setting. So what does this mean? The film is completely predictable. The entire time you’re watching it you’re just waiting for the final battle scene, which we all know is coming due it being in the trailer (hundreds of millions of dollars on advertising, remember?), but, oo, that flower’s pretty!
Along the same lines, the setups were very forced. I don’t want to spoil it, but the panther early on, the terydactyl skull, the whole “seeing” thing (I could look up the actual names of these things, but would you really recognize them in Na’vi?) are obviously planted early on so as to get a payoff later on. What’s more, everything ties back in at the end of the film. It is far too convenient to be considered realistic. Obviously, we know none of Pandora is anywhere near real, but, once we’ve learned the world, it would be nice to think, “Well, in this world, yeah, I could see that happening.” Bows and arrows taking down helicopters, animals fighting on behalf of humans without any training, and blunt knives being thrust through foot-thick glass from the year 2154 just don’t seem realistic, even in Pandora.
Finally, the acting was average and the dialogue was horrible. Sam Worthington seemed flat to me in the film, but, in fairness to him and the other actors, there was not a lot to work with. Characters were either flat and undeveloped or just switched sides without an explanation (Jake Sully being the only exception to both, and even his development seemed forced). Further, the dialogue was bad. I laughed at the most dramatic parts of the movie because the dialogue was so painfully awkward. I just wish that they had said, “Peek-a-boo” in front of “I see you”…
Overall, Avatar was a brilliant business move. I believe it was really the first film to unlock the potential of 3-D, IMAX and it has obviously opened the floodgates. Further, the attention to detail and beauty of Pandora is truly remarkable. Its stunning backdrop resulted only due to the hard work of dedicated artists and visionaries. However, the actual story is very forgettable and passable. If you saw it in theaters or haven’t spent upwards of a grand on your home entertainment system, don’t bother renting this (again). However, if you have a good TV and you want to see what all the fuss is about, go ahead and check it out. Hopefully your lowered expectations will enhance your enjoyment of it.
Scale:
1- Lots of Better Movies at Blockbuster
2- Might Be Worth Renting
3- Rent It When You Get to It
4- A Must Rent, at some point
5- Put It in Your Queue NOW!
My Rating: 3.5
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